Sunday, November 28, 2010

Family Planning & Kindergarten Admission


Wife in romantic mood: Honey! Don't you think we should start a family now and add a new member to our family?

Husband kissing her in return: I sure do baby. Tomorrow first thing I will do is to check with the 'Kindergarten availability' for our child for the year 2013, and then we can go ahead with our plan, baby.




Tring Tring: (

Receptionist: Hello, ‘ST. Blossom Kindergarten and Nursery school’

Husband: Hello, I am Mr. John. Me and my wife are thinking of having a baby and so I wanna check the availability of seats for our 'Baby-to-be' in the year 2013.

Receptionist: Oh no Sir, The admission for the year 2013 is already full. For 2013 batch, you should have taken your 'baby-to-be' admission in the year 2009 itself sir.

Husband: What the hell! I was not even married then.

Receptionist: Sir, if someone is planning to have a baby 2years after marriage, they should apply for their child's admission even before they say, "I Do".

Anyways Sir, All I can do is, we are soon going to start admission for the year 2015 and I can give you the reminder call once we start with the process, so that you can do your family planning accordingly. Will that be fine sir. Hello.. Hello.. Sir are you on the line?

Husband: Oh Yes, I am very much on the line. Just was lost in my thoughts. I will be delighted if you give me reminder call. Thank you.






Looking at India's daily increasing population, this situation is not that far. My aunt, who along with her husband runs a well-known school here in Pune, visited us few months back. My sis asked her about the admission process for Ahana, who soon gonna turn 9 Months (Old enough to start 'Abhyas' with daily A,B,C and 'Hickory Dickory dock' and 'A for Attractive - B for Beautiful - C for cute' songs). My aunt informed us that we need to take admission for kindergarten, play group or nursery one year in advance.

Wow! In short, next year when Ahana turns 1, we will register her for play group, even before she is done with her potty training.

If this situation continues, the children who will be born in the year 2020, their parents will need to secure admission for their grandchildren too. Shit! Just Imagine...

Year 2017: I am Mr. John, getting married in the year 2018 and wanna secure kindergarten admission for my daughter for the year 2022 and for my grandchildren in 2049. The daughter has to do only one thing, produce baby in the 'Right year, right day and right time'.

Soon Matrimony site will also provide this facility. Bharat Matrimony or Shaadi (dot) com or any other matrimony site for that matter, providing a facility saying, "choose your dream partner with our help and we will secure a seat for your 'child-to-be' in kindergarten.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Tribute to Mangesh Deshpande

Mangesh Deshpande:

Many close to Mangesh can write many things on Mangesh as a person and as a trekker. I thought of sharing few of my experience with him, as, somewhere I give credit to Mangesh for all the treks I had done till date. As I always say, “Looking into the mirror, I stand 5’ feet tall, thin. I never thought I will be doing trekking or for that matter rock climbing and other adventures I had done till date. It was just because of Mangesh who encouraged me to do all impossible.”

It’s been one year since that accident took Mangesh and Sada's life. I still remember Parag Thorat calling me on Wednesday morning on 21th October 2009 to give me the shocking news that Mangesh and Sada got killed while descending down the wall after summit - one of his many Himalaya Expeditions on 19th October 2010. Disbelief – Anger – Shocked – Protest - Tears went through all but yet to accept it as Harsh Truth. Those who know Mangesh will agree that he has got tremendous stamina & strength to survive in extreme conditions and so somewhere in my heart, I believe he is still alive. Atleast he is 100% alive in all trekkers heart. Those in Chakram Hikers and everyone in trekking / adventure world know Mangesh as one of the best trekker in India. The fit person I know. For many he is like the ‘Father figure’ in trekking. He has encouraged many to start trekking and reach the height they have achieved today. How can I be different?

Mangesh has inspired me to do all impossible. It was Mangesh who believed in me and took me to ‘khechi treks’. I am here sharing few of my memories with Mangesh.

My first encounter with Mangesh: A tall, dark and bald person. Fit looking with expressive eyes. Listening to everyone and talking little, cracking jokes @ places. In bus, took the first seat, not singing and doing awaligiri like us. When forced to sing, sang some nursery rhymes from his daughter Rama’s book and A,B,C in reversed way. In my first encounter with Mangesh some 12years back, I tend to look at his old black-n-white photo taken some 10yrs ago. In photo, he was a college going young guy having lots of hair. With good humour he said, “Don’t go with my today’s bald look. And this photo is not that old, it’s taken just 2 years ago, when I was of your age”.

Ulhas Valley: There was something different in Mangesh. With him, one used to feel a positive energy. Knowing, unknowingly he used to spread tremendous positive vibes in the trekking group. One incident of ‘Ulhas valley’ would like to share. Ulhas valley is one of my favourite trek spot. ‘A’ grade trek, only for experienced trekkers. It was my 2nd Ulhas valley trek with Mangesh. After climbing down the valley, stands a huge waterfall, with tremendous force. I remember Mangya standing inside that very waterfall. Even the drizzle of it used to cause lot of pain. I wanted to try it once, not the same waterfall but some 10% less forceful waterfall. I told Mangya my desire and he quickly said, “Chal ki mag!” (Come let’s go). Holding his hand tightly I went inside, just to realize that it’s just out of my capacity to withhold it for too long. I asked Mangesh to pull me out. This did not fell on his deaf ears. I thought due to crushing noise he was unable to hear my words. So I yelled. Yelled, yelled and yelled. But Mangesh was holding me tight. Unable to move, unable to breathe properly, I thought I was finished. Finally when I had no energy left to yell, Mangesh pulled me out. After taking deep breath I yelled at him, “Mangya are yaar, me mele aste” (I would have died). He said, “Till the time you had energy to yell, you had energy to stand inside that waterfall. When you stopped yelling I pulled you out”. He was awali in his own way. Next generation will miss a leader like him.

BhimaShankar Shidi Ghat: Again a challenging trek. After 2nd shidi (ladder) there is a traverse (a rock patch wherein one need to go from one end to another, other end not visible. Below is the huge valley). Mangesh took the lead, helping everyone to cross the traverse. One need to hold a small ditch / pit naturally created in the rocks with hands and then there is a small ditch for your feet, so that holding the pit firmly with your hands one can walk / pull oneself by taking support of the ditch where one can place your feet (rather a small ditch to place your toe fingers). With my height, after holding a ditch with my hands, I was not able to reach till the ditch to stand even after stretching myself to fullest. I told this to Mangesh. He asked me to grab the ditch only with my hands and asked me to swing and pull myself over. Not forgetting to tell me not to look down the valley even once. I did it, just because Mangesh asked me too and because I too had tremendous faith in him. I did it successfully just to realise that my height is too short to land my foot at the end of traverse. I was hanging there, at some 2500ft. Not looking down. Just hanging. I tried hard to pull over, but was scared to lose my grip. Mangesh once again came to my rescue. He took the support of the tree and leaned towards me. With just one hand he lifted me like a doll and there I was standing near Mangesh looking at the 2500 ft valley with success. With joy I yelled, “Mangesh, I don’t believe, I did it”. He looked at me n said, “Mag!” After that I did BhimaShankar Shidi Ghat one more time, but made sure Mangesh is gonna come along. I seriously don’t think, I trust any other firm hand in those ghats. Somewhere inside I know without Mangesh I won’t be doing Shidi ghat again.

Rock climbing: My impossible dream. I just stared going to Mumbra for rock climbing practice every Sunday morning. Once Mangesh was in Mumbai on Sunday morning and so he joined us to Mumbra rock climbing practice. It was rear after he shifted to Pune. I was trying to climb a huge rock. For me it was one of the difficult climbing techniques. After trying it for some 10 times with Vilas helping me in between, I was able to climb it all by myself. Once down, I told Mangesh that due to short height I got limitations in climbing. I can’t take grip which are beyond my height. Mangesh, pulling my leg and with naughty smile said, “amhi pan amcha height cha evadhyach grip ghetto” (we also too take grip which are in our capacity). He then gave the biggest certificate to me by saying, “Tu height ni short ahes mhanun jasta technique use karun, technically climbing karte. Jyanchi height jasta aste amcha sarkhi te height cha wapar karun climbing kartat rather than technique. Tu climbing kartana, khalun bhagaila chan vatta karan chooti chooti pawala gheun tu efficiently climb kartes, whereas sometime amhi climb kartana haat-pai marlya sarkhe vattat”. (Being short in height, you do rock climbing using all climbing techniques. Whereas sometime we just use our height to take the grip instead of technique. Your climbing look more professional and look good while watching you doing climbing.) His words I remember as it is. It was like the biggest certificate for me.

Dhene-Ratan: Mangesh being father figure to many was not all that perfect. He too like other human being had some flaws. Mangesh liked challenging himself. If he had climbed any mountain in say 8hrs, next time he will try to climb it in 5hrs. I still remember Dhene-Ratan trek. Refusing few other girls he took me for the trek, which itself was a big thing for me. We all started with myself (Sharvani Khare), Mangesh Deshpande, Anju Paniculam, MB (Mahesh Bhalerao), Ameya Gokhale, Sudeep Barve, Aniket Chaudhari, Rupali Bhagwat, Ashwinikumar, Annie and Jyotsna Kanekar. For Mangesh, Aniket and Sudeep it was a load ferry trek (Packing bag with heavy load for the trek). It was their practice trek before Himalaya Expedition. It was a stretched trek, what we call it as kechi trek. Annie and Jyotsna got stressed out and decided to return. Aniket too got a bad cramp in his leg and was unable to walk. Mangesh told him not to stretch himself and stay fit for Himalaya expedition instead. Thus Aniket and two girls decided to return back. While climbing up, it all went fine. All tired but was excited to do the khechi trek. Next morning after breakfast at 4.00am we started to descend. Mangesh in challenging his own capacity forgot the meeting spot and went far ahead with Anju. We all remaining trekkers gathered at the meeting spot for the lunch waiting for Mangesh and Anju. To our distress, we kept all our lunch packets in Mangesh’s bag. Being forest area we got worried when we waited for them for more than 2hrs. It was then decided that me along with Rupali, her friend Ashwinikumar and Watadya should move ahead, and MB, Ameya and Sudeep will go inside the forest to search them both. Me, Rupali & Ashwinikumar followed watadya walking slow and marked every junction for MB, Ameya & Sudeep’s convenience. Watadya shared his apple with us, each of us getting one piece. Late at night when we reached the village we saw Mangesh & Anju waiting for us with our lunch pack. We had our lunch pack @ around 8.00pm as dinner. There was a little anger roar, little burst, but all well that’s ends well. And what we say, “Treks me aaise chooti chooti bate hoti rahati hey!” (such small things do happens in treks). For me I never thought I can do such khechi trek only on a single price of apple. When you look at some person as perfectionist, little mistakes do count. Mangesh too realised his mistake and shared a big amras can he kept especially for us. So it was all-together Happy ending.

Lobhi – Lonawala Bhimashankar: It’s called trekkers trek. I once told Mangesh my desire to do this trek and without thinking he said, "kar ki mag" (Go, do it!). I asked him, mala jamel ka? (Will I be able to do it?) And he said, "Jamel ki" (why not, sure you can do it). This attitude I have never seen in any other trekker. Just for Mangesh I tried Lobhi this year (2010). But due to my bad knee I was not able to finish it till the end. Moreover, with lots of heavy rains even others were not able to cross the river and had to return half way. I once again will do this khechi trek and once finished wanna dedicate it to Mangesh.

Few good and few bad memories of Mangesh, I will always cherish throughout my life. I won’t say I miss him; he is always with us in our every treks. I thank him to be there and for encouraging me to do all impossible.

-Sharvani Khare

19th October 2010

Friday, September 10, 2010

My new source of money!

I recently received a letter saying I have won $ 100 million in the lucky draw from some company in America. I never was aware that I am so much known personality in USA that some company wants to share some 40% if I help them transfer $ 100 million to my account for others to use it. I know you are thinking that it’s all fake letters and that its a bull shit and a big fraud. You certainly will think so as I am the one who got selected for the award and not YOU!

And if I ever got caught, I will have to spend my entire life in Jail. That’s it! But why to refuse such a big amount for the probability of ‘If I ever get caught!’ It’s a big, BIG amount after all. I can then be owner of company I am currently working for. Or probably I can buy a small island and spent my whole life in luxury and fishing. Being in India I can bribe many political parties and then stand for election myself. I have lot many chances to win the elections and be Prime Minister Sharvani Khare. Sound so kool.

I am planning to build a bigger house than Mittal. My new bungalow photos will be used as fwd mail chain. Can you guess whose house is this? This luxury bungalow is of Sharvani Khare, the richest person in India. Probably even Opera will call me to express my feelings when I was declared winner. Or probably to share my emotions with others where I will thank my parents, friends and American company for supporting me to be extremely rich. I hope my school teachers who used to think I can do nothing good watch the opera show and see themselves how rich and successful I am today.

I will be then listed with those people who were failure as a child and then turned out to be big successor in life. Amitabh Bachchan, Lucille Ball, Michael Jordan and Sharvani Khare – Failure as a child turned out to be most successful people on the earth.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Life is a Kaleidoscope of different colours

“Life is a Kaleidoscope of different colours”.

3 minutes of twists, turns, and a fireworks style colour collage of images in Kaleidoscope. In Life too you are given colours plate to collage your life in various colours.

We always refer to change in colours with Nature. I think, like Nature, our life too is a multi-coloured Kaleidoscope. When we peep into a Kaleidoscope we see different colours blending with each other to create beautiful forms. Similarly life is a mixture of various colours. One should learn to blend these colours of emotions in life in a way that when you peep into your own kaleidoscope you could see a nice & pleasant form(s) of life. God has given us this “Canvas of Life” to paint it with colours of true happiness, roar of laughter, pinch of sorrows and lots of experience. Some people paint it only with sadness, worries and mistakes while others blend sadness with a roar of laughter and happiness. It’s we artist who brings life to our canvas board. We have to decide which colour to apply, whether to paint life with colours of laughter, smile, satisfaction, happiness or with sadness, worries, trouble and regret.

I always believe, “Staying happy is in ones own hand”. One cannot enforce anyone to be happy. It’s like a self-discovered path. Parents, family, friends will guide and support you, but they can’t paint colours in your canvas on your behalf. Every individual has got the copyright of his/her canvas. You have to explore your canvas for the best output at the end. It might include wrong colours combination or change of strokes but ultimately try painting it as beautiful as possible. Don’t paint canvas in a single colour to make it look dull. It should be a mixture of light& dark shades, transparent & fine strokes. One should learn to blend these colours of emotions perfectly for a beautiful collage.

All we need to do is ‘blend them well into a beautiful Shedding.

"Enjoy life & Keep Smiling! And keep painting your life with beautiful colours!!"

NOTE: I have just changed my ‘Humor pen’ to an ‘Emotional pen’ to write this blog. It’s just a try to paint my canvas in a different colour. Hope I am able to blend it well.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Go Green [On the screen]…

Go Green [On the screen]…

‘Please help me in my Chicken bung’ was the message I received few days back from my friend making me realize how much we are addicted to Facebook or per say Farmvilla. It did bothered my a lot when Facebook access was denied in my company. Quick 1-2 min break to peep-in to my friend’s life used to help my KRA grades. Really am not kidding… I scored some 10% less than my previous quarter after many fun sites were blocked. We need a booster like 'farming' to keep us up on our toes. To harvest the crops, to milk the cow, to pat your cat, to love & collect horse hair are necessary things. Company should understand that we are just being Eco-Friendly. “Go Green [On your screen]”. Sometimes I feel like calling those animal lovers to protest against the ban of Facebook in all the offices across the world.

One day I was at home playing on my laptop, when mom called me. I told her I am busy doing Farming. To her least interest, she gave me that typical mommy look which she always preserve for such occasions n said, “Jara gharatali 4 kama kara” [Do some household work]. That was a clear warning in polite words to STOP! How can one concentrate when your seeds are about to weathered or when your flowers are about to droop. I need to water then regularly. Once it’s time to bed I again login to fetch my hungry chickens and collect fruits from the trees which gives me plenty of fruits 24/7 and a good amount of cash/coins. I just wish I could use those cash to buy real fruits. “Bhaiya, jara 1000 FV coins ke seeb dena’. After all I am one of the richest farmers having big farm, plenty of trees, animals, outhouse, tractor, harvester, etc etc. List is unending. Oh! Not to forget School / Library / Post office of my own and a luxurious Villa. To give an Indian touch I recently got a ‘Rickshaw’.

Farmvilla helps for increasing GK too. I was not aware that a farmer can earn fuel by just lending a hand to neighbor’s farm without actually paying for it. Also, ugly duckling if looked after and cared properly gets transformed into a beautiful swan. My granny never ended her ugly duckling story in this way. Now I see to it that I update the latest version of all the stories to my niece, she deserves to know. Facebook also helped me in searching the names of some xyz friend. I am very bad at remembering names and thus search the name in Facebook. I have some 60 neighbors in Farmvilla whom I know personally. Actually all added people in my Facebook are known people to me. Relatives, School, college, trek friends are all in the list. Facebook helps me to keep track of what is happening in my so-called name forgotten friend’s life. It’s important to know who ‘The Friend of The day’ is. But I care so much about my friend privacy that I hardly buzz her or write on the wall. Also one can tally astrologer say, at the end of the day. ‘Your lucky colour is Persian Blue’. Oh! And I went to office wearing aqua blue. Now I know the reason why my boss was not able to digest my suggestion. Next time will make sure to first login to Facebook, check the lucky colour of the day and then directly ask for increment. One of my friend has managed to reach level 70+ of Farmvilla and has got some 600+ friends. Wow! he got to be a known personality and famous than Big B, Bill Gates or Mallika Sherawat.

Yesterday I visited my Dr. friend. Waiting at the lobby I saw one old lady searching for some help. She was an addict. She was looked so perfect except that she was searching for the board which says, 'your problem of the day is' and liked by some 100 people. Once she was done I went inside just to say hi-hello to my friend. My friend looked really worried. When asked she said that the old lady has a new modern and weird addiction called FA 'Facebook Addiction'. She found out about her addiction after reading a wall from her friend which said, 'Sorry for loss of your husband last week'. Till then she was not even aware of it. So FA - Facebook addiction has added to the list of addictions.

Oh! my seeds are fully grown. I need to go and harvest those. Bye bye....